I’m not sure I’m going to be able to do justice to this review, folks. Seriously, the phone could be a hand-me-down Windows 7 phone with all the buttons missing and I would still think it was space-age technology, as long as it doesn’t advertise its top feature as ‘FM Radio’. (Yup. Some people still think that ‘FM Radio’ is a feature worth advertising.)

Here it is, out of the box and in my hand. In fact, it’s unlikely to ever leave my hand again. I give little squeals of pleasure every time I stroke its lovely shiny screen. People in the office think I’m cracking up.

So, stay tuned as I take my first happy steps into smartphonedom and experience the joys and sorrows of touchscreens, autocorrect and app stores for the very first time. I may even get around to listing the features of the HTC Wildfire along the way.